Problem Child

Although he was never a football coach, Francis Scott Key Fitzgerald had some great one liners. Being blessed with a memory to rival that of Guy Pearce’s character in Memento, I’ve written a few of them down over the years.

His novel ‘The Great Gatsby’ is one of the best books I’ve read. It lays bare some myths about America but I’m not about to get started on all that jazz. The point is that the yarn’s got a fair few razor sharp and witty sentences inside it to rival Oscar Wilde's best citations. Take this example:

“Thirty – the promise of a decade of loneliness, a thinning list of single men to know, a thinning brief-case of enthusiasm, thinning hair”

The bastard!

Another favourite quote from Gatsby refers to reading books:

“I was going to…become again that most limited of all specialists, the ‘well-rounded man’. This isn’t just an epigram – life is much more successfully looked at from a single window after all”

If you equate success to money and bling-bling, as our society unequivocally does these days, then FSKF certainly has a point. Particularly if you are talking about a specialist skill which is excessively rewarded (football in this case). After a good rub of the green, the most entirely flawed specialist / professional footballer on earth, whether or not also a veritable psycho, can get away with a fair bit of murder once material success is achieved.

So long as they’ve got the dosh, they’ll also afford enough agents and friends to tell them they’re right about everything. Which very often is all they want to hear. Some of these footballers also begin to imagine they’re a god and create an dreamlike never never land where they are always right. Of course this heaven quickly evaporates into a lonely hell once the dough and / or respect of the public are gone. Perhaps I should offer them counselling for a 'small' fee.

I guess this is a week in which AC Milan fans should really be chuffed. After wisely strengthening their rearguard and midfield, they engaged in some last minute deadline day drama and snatched up Ibrahimovic and Robinho.

I should be over the moon, shouldn’t I? As Berlusconi would probably add, AC Milan fans should be grateful.

Which I guess makes me an ungrateful sod.

These words may yet return to haunt me (like Defoe did against Bulgaria this week) but there was something unsettling about Robi and Ibra heading to Milanello to join Robinho and Pato. Not that one can dispute their talents, although others have done so in the past. They’re certainly players that deserve first team football although it’s still an open question whether or not they can be cogs in the wheels of a big club.

And that’s the first potential hitch.

Can Milan really fit all four strikers into the same starting lineup? Or is Allegri starting to bend over to 'il Presidente' a little bit too much? And was there a need for two more strikers after Borriello, Pato, Ronaldinho and Inzaghi played their socks off in AC Milan’s excellent first day drubbing of Lecce? Let’s hope the new recruits don’t wind up being two flies in the ointment.

They certainly aren’t going to be the type of guys who mince their words if their playing time is restricted. Much as they’re renowned for their specialist football skills, they’re also two young guys who always say and get what they want off the field. Which some may consider a high degree of success.

So has modern day football become the playground of the superstar problem child ? Guys like Ibra and Balotelli probably work very hard in training and have prodigious talents. But do they work any harder than professionals and specialists in other fields besides football? Whether they do or not , these guys are actually beginning to think they are worth the ludicrous sums they earn and entitled to do and say whatever they like without showing any respect towards others. But besides being unfortunate, this behaviour also comes across as being crass. No matter how much exposure the press gives every slur they breathe, it doesn’t make bitchy and bitter little comments brave or worthy ones.

There seemed to be a time when players without dignity or cool heads were avoided by big clubs. I recall one Francesco Totti being touted to move to a big club at a time when he himself did nothing to deny all of the rumours. Then he regaled us to one of his many acts of lunacy on the pitch, when he slapped Siena’s Colonnese to the ground. No doubts were entertained after this act of indiscipline that none of the big boys would lift a finger to buy him. Low and behold, the very next day Totti swore undying love and fealty to Roma, proudly declaring that he would remain there until the end of his career (and therefore continue to do what the hell he likes on the field).

This also too place at international level. Lippi gave the likes of Di Canio, Balotelli and Cassano the cold shoulder during his time as Italy coach. Which is not to mention England manager Kevin Keegan ignoring Ben Thatcher when the latter tried to remove half of Nicky Summerbee’s face with his elbow. Not to be outdone, Thatcher instead played for the Welsh dragons at international level, perhaps hoping to follow up on the equally thuggish and hilarious exploits of the likes of Robbie Savage and Vinnie Jones (presently honoured by Bellamy in the modern era).
 

 

Yet the last transfer window seemed to fly in the face of all tradition, where ‘problem children’ like Balotelli have won big money transfers to Manchester City (although it seems we should be thankful that he didn’t also end up being placed in AC Milan’s problem child nursery!) after his most memorable moment last season was hurling his Inter top onto the pitch in a fit of rage after the club had arguably secured its most famous champs league triumph ever.

Inter were wise to offload him to Man City in exchange of all of that money. After having been ripped off for years, the blue side of Milan incredibly turned the tables on another big spending club. Hardly had the dummies of Bellamy, Ireland and Robinho dried on the City of Manchester's turf that Mancini bought himself a new incredible sulk. Perhaps three for one can be seen as a shrewd bit of business by City and for their sakes one hopes that ‘Il Mancio’ can exercise enough control over Balotelli to curb his madness.

But besides the questionable personalities of AC Milan's latest striking duo, there is also a big question mark hanging over how these acquisitions will affect the club’s dressing room. Perhaps these things are overlooked in an Italian election year. But was it worth sacrificing a splendid footsoldier like Borriello for an egomaniac and a half pint nutter who will refuse to ever sit on the bench? Does their arrival not threaten the balance in the squad?

After watching his performance against Lecce, many AC Milan fans were saddened to see Borriello leave AC Milan. It was a separation comparable to the pain of Liverpool ditching Robbie Fowler in 2001 and Giuseppe Signori leaving Lazio in 1998. Some might unjustly dispute his quality, forgetting that Man City and Real Madrid both wanted him in their ranks before he opted to join Ranieri’s Roma revolution instead.

And there’s also another concern.

In an age when trophies are being hogged by wealthy owners with bowsers of money, the way a club projects itself on and off the field has assumed greater importance. If your owner isn’t splashing the dosh, it becomes harder to win all the time. But clubs can at least still preserve their image and reputation. Which is why the likes of United and Juventus are generally accorded respect by fans of other clubs. Not for them a crass multi-million dollar gamble on a misfit.

The same can also be said of Arsenal, who although having won nowt in the last few seasons are respected throughout the world for their brand of crisp passing football and their dealings off the pitch. Season after season Wenger has revealed himself to be a canny operator, refusing to be held to ransom by agents. This was mentioned this week by Liverpool stalwart Jamie Carragher who stressed the importance of Liverpool restoring its image as a club that wins and loses with dignity. ‘Carra’ insisted that Liverpool should become more like Arsenal, which in his book appears to be as important as winning.

Having tired of seeing Inter dominate the Serie A, I can only hope that Allegri manages to harness the arcane talents at his disposal. The stars are not badly aligned for him. Problem children sometimes recognise their last chance saloons and Ibra and Robi should have enough sense not to blow their chance at Milan.

“Che Dio c’e la mandi buona!”